This blog has gone serious. It’s heavy stuff. In other words, it’s crap.
How did that happen?
I don’t know. I wrote three entries and instead of having fun, telling stories, sharing and bursting with enthusiasm, I found my place among the stars and from there farted out some heavy stuff. Nothing like a philosophy of live on internet. Come on.
So don’t read anything I wrote so far. Please, don’t. It’s way too serious.
It turns out that nobody is safe in this world. Everyone is in danger of being tempted by SUCCESSSSS. Once you give into this shit you will immediately start reading about how to write blogs professionally, how to create websites professionally and how to do marketing professionally. Then you will start creating plans for the Conquest of Internet. Meanwhile you’ll go to the toilet and try to make your shit good looking and healthy. Make sure you flush it a professional way. In a scientific and ecological way, approved by celebrities and authorities. What you need is a pro-shit in your toiler, so you don’t have to be ashamed of it.
And the truth is, I’m ashamed of almost everything I do . I write, talk, draw and sing, but everything seems so weak and pathetic to me. No logo, no tagline, no branding. Such ordinary stuff. It certainly won’t attract anyone.
So I wanted to stary this blog differently. At least this one. At least me logo is great. Have you seen my logo? Do you like it? It’s an awesome logo. I am not ashamed of my logo. I want everyone to buy stuff with my logo on it, because it looks so good. But nobody will, because the rest of this blog is too serious and too boring. And the more I try, the more serious and boring it becomes
Why the f**k do I try so hard? Why can’t I just relax?
People today are really f**ked up in their heads. When they see something really personal and sincere, they feel embarrassed. Even more so if it’s them who get too personal and sincere with others. It is increasingly difficult to distinguish between a robot and a human.
Why does everybody require such inhuman professionalism from everybody else? Why am I ashamed of being me? Why are you ashamed of being you? You think you’re not? Well, then ask yourself: why do you write comments so rarely? I’ve been writing and publishing on internet for nearly 30 years and if 100 people read me, only one leaves a comment. I have asked so many times: “how is it possible that you have been reading or listening to me for two years now and have not even commented once”?
The answer is: “oh, it’s because blah, blah, blah, fart, fart, fart”. He tells me some crap about having nothing interesting to say and being not important enough to drop a comment. But the truth is that he is ashamed.
What can you do? I understand what he feels. I am also ashamed. What I do is of poor quality, unimportant and nobody cares. That’s what I feel like. The only difference between him and me is that I am ashamed and do not stop. He is ashamed and does not start.
Oh look, what a wise and beautiful thought I just wrote! Are you in awe yet? I even made it bold!
But why, for heaven sake, did I just do that? I don’t know. I really do not know. But in all honestly my guess is this: I probably want you to acknowledge the wisdom of this blog and appreciate how f**ing smart I am. So you subscribe and keep coming back for more wisdom. Isn’t it what blogging, podcasting and publishing on YouTube is all about?
Sure it is.
I would love burn someone at stake for this state of affairs. Who wouldn’t? It’s always fun to unzip your fly and pee all over YouTube on those absurd, brainless asshole celebrities. But the truth is, they, we, me, and you all do the same shit. And we do this shit for roughly the same reason.
We are ashamed of who we really are. So we want to pretend we are what they expect to see. As simple as that. We chase success, stats, subs, likes. We want to turn every honest, sincere, personal thought into a product, before we feel safe enough to show it to the Great Wide World.
Great Wide World, what a cesspool full of crap it is. It’s boring, stupid and not worth farting. Idiots, cowards and people too lazy to breath on their own. And we are all trying to make it like us!
Oh I know it, believe me. I’ve been watched by millions on internet for that last twenty years. And that’s why I’m so frustrated with myself today with this bad start of this blog. I should know better.
What I really wanted was to tell you something personal and something private. No marketing, no campaigns, no policy, no targeting. Just good old conversation between new friends. No pretending. No masks. No fear of being incorrect, politically or otherwise.
I have not much change for any sort of success with that attitude. I chose it anyways and I choose it gladly.
Because I have a choice, like everybody else. I can go for a shameless success or I can go unprofessional and ashamed. It’s a choice between success and happiness. And I have chosen happiness.
I want to do whatever I want to do.
That’s the live I’ve been living. Stupid, unpopular but incredibly honest. Last 30 years of my life I can only describe as spectacular. I see no reason to stop now.
So no more trying to make people like me and respect me. It’s be all personal and honest from now on. With a laugh every now and then, because that’s who I am. I will not write as en expert. I will write as me.
Yes, I’m gonna do it. Because I can.